"I Walk by Faith, Not by Sight"

I woke up today feeling so great - even better than being in a Disney movie! I woke up and I felt more joy than Ammon and the Sons of Mosiah after converting the Lamanites. It’s that kind of day today! 

Mother! I am feeling better! It's been interesting with this sickness. It's a roller coaster of coughing mucus and throwing up, then having a great day! It's been funny. I have learned a lot of lessons from it. So, we have not moved into the new place yet, but I will explain more about that. I have been able to have fun being sick! When people ask me if I am sick I stick to the classic line, "Oh yeah, don’t worry, it's just a rental." I am sure you are rolling your eyes right now. I apologize, but it really has helped to make the best and most fun of an unpleasant experience.

It was great to hear from Elder Ballard, but it was a little difficult because I was not feeling FLASHLIGHT! [Inside family joke] But I was able to write down everything and anything that he said. It felt great being able to hear him speak.

So, last week I gave an update about where we are residing. We are hitting a minor road bump right now. So when Elder Henson of the mission office called Judy to let her know we are leaving things took a spin. Elder Henson is a man with a soft heart, and Judy told him she feels safe, protected and spiritual when we are living with her. I do not know the legitimacy of Judy's statement, but Elder Henson gave her a chance to clean up the black mold and see what happens after that. Judy came and talked to us, and asked ,”If I clean up the black mold will you guys be happy?” I told Judy it would probably be best for her house, and yes, I had been feeling a little bit under the weather. Judy told us. “yeah I know you're sick, I will get a guy out here to clean the mold and everything will be good, right??” I can not judge but I struggled to feel the heartfelt concern Judy had for us. So the mold inspector came and it turns out he will have to do a total reconstruction of the bathroom. There is mold behind the ceilings and underneath the floors - everywhere. It made sense that the mold was under the floor. I was questioning why the tile floor felt like carpet. So the lease is not up until August. So we thought we would be living here until August. I was able to start thinking of how to put this fuzzy black mold to good use. Mother, I was thinking of knitting my precious mom a nice black mold sweater! And don’t worry mom, I heard black mold never shrinks, so the sweater will always fit! But then one of the greatest men ever stepped in. President Packard. President Packard heard about our situation, and as soon as he heard about it, he immediately called us. I talked to him and told him the situation. So he told us this - he understands that Judy feels safe with us, but doesn't factor her opinion in to our situation. He told me if living conditions don't change in a week, and if I am still feeling unhealthy and the mold problem isn't fixed, "I don’t care if we have to pay for two apartments, we are getting you boys out of there, your well-being is all that matters."  President Packard is the best and most caring mission president. I sincerely felt like he was looking out for me like a father. Breaking the lease to the apartment is another problem on top of everything else. So, Elder Campbell and I are going to use our best judgment, and try to focus on what's going to be the best for the area. So we will find out in a week whether we stay or we go! Judy makes me feel somewhat like a hostage. I get scared she will come at me with her yoga mat or Frank Sinatra records. Yes, I am being highly dramatic. At the end of the day, we will use our best judgment, and it doesn't matter how awful the apartment is, as long as the Lord’s work progresses.

Mom, I am glad I am able to recognize my issue with pride, and I am currently challenging and humbling myself as I work on it. I realize it is simply because I need to rely on the Lord a lot more! I sometimes unconsciously have this attitude of “ok, I can do this better or I can do it myself.” I never say that to myself but when it comes down to the true source of the problem that is what is occurring. I need Elder Campbell and I need the Lord. Every time I feel myself slipping into this mindset I tell myself ,”I walk by faith, not by sight.” I know I need to be in tune with the spirit to be that missionary I know I can be. I am growing stronger, but I know there is so much more room for improvement! It’s like eating an elephant one bite at a time.

I feel my family's prayers. I feel your prayers. I just feel your love. I can't tell you how much my family means to me and the excitement I have to raise my own. I love you so much! Have a good week! I am going on a hike this P-day! Stoked! Love you! 

Elder Tait